Wars and Walking
by writer.philosopher
Summary: We are always at war. With ourselves, with our friends, with our enemies. But when we are at war, how do we walk?
1. Walking Fast

**WARS AND WALKING**

Chapter One: Walking Fast

_Most people walk quickly because they have a place to go. Zuko… didn't have a place to go._

The sound of rapid footsteps bounced off the side of a stone building. People – children, I think, based on the laughter and the size and weight of what I felt – scattered as the owner of the footsteps came around the corner at high speed. I hid from the sight of the person walking past and wondered what he was thinking and where he had to go so quickly. I had to stop myself from laughing. Zuko was hilarious when he was mad, not that I could see the expression he wore. Though I'm sure _that_ was funny too.

I used my earthbending to 'watch' Zuko travel the street, going nowhere. I knew he was going nowhere, or he would have told us where he was going. I entertained ideas of bending to slow him in his rush to nowhere, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I couldn't help but feel a little bit responsible for his mood. I thought back to that morning…

"_Toph!" Katara cried._

"_I'm AWAKE!" I snapped. It was a normal morning in Avatar camp. Katara was being too motherly, Sokka too ambitious, and me much too tired. I earthbended my tent away huffily with a stomp of my foot._

"_Ugh! You're worse than my uncle," I heard Zuko accuse. I couldn't feel his presence, so I assumed he must be in the water._

"_He's a fat, smelly old man!" I shouted, not knowing how loud I should speak to let Zuko hear me but not really caring if my noise bothered anybody else. "Just forget him. Kataaaara's in charge now." I felt bad. I had met Iroh; he was a good man so I understood how Zuko felt about losing him._

"_Shouldn't Aang be in charge?" Zuko asked, overlooking my insult to the closest member of his family, and I could tell that he was right behind me. "I mean, he _is_ the Avatar."_

"_Twinkle toes couldn't handle the responsibility. We need Mommy over there to make sure we're all good little bys and girls."_

_My highly sensitive ears had no trouble catching Zuko's half-hidden chuckle._

Now, had I known that my next comment would have offended Zuko… Well, I probably would have kept talking anyway…

"_Maybe you need a nickname!" I told him brightly, turning halfway around for his sake. "Like Twinkle toes. Sokka had a nickname too, but it didn't really stick. Maybe yours will." I paused and pretended to give him the once-over. "How bout scarface?"_

"_Toph," Sokka cautioned, entering my field of 'vision.' I sensed his weight change and gathered that he was stretching up on his toes._

"_Eh, deal with me," I shot at him. "OH! How about something that shows how angry you are! No, no, no. ZUZU! Wittle Zuzu," I crooned._

In retrospect, it was probably _this_ nickname that angered him the most. I had wondered what was wrong with it at the time, but now as I 'watched' him storm across the town, I could actually feel his anger.

"_NEVER call me that!"_

"_Why?" Aang had arrived. I would know his dainty ballerina's gait anywhere._

"_Because!"_

"_That isn't really a very god answer, you know." I just loved to provoke Zuko. I loved to provoke everyone, but I was especially good at it when it came to Zuko. He got angry so easily._

"_Well that's your problem," he grumbled. "Because it's all the answer you're getting." His weight shifted and his footsteps moved quickly away from me._

"_Nice one!" Sokka cried, probably throwing his hands in the air. "Now there's a crazy firebender loose, AND he's angry!!"_

"_Sokka, he's _always_ angry," Katara said, not unreasonably. "And he's a free person. He can go wherever he wants to go."_

"_Oooh, standing up for him, are you?" I taunted._

"_No!" I loved it when Katara got all defensive with or about Zuko. "Oh my gosh, look at him!" she shouted suddenly, causing someone to jump. I think it was Sokka._

"_Oh, sure, tell the blind girl to look at someone." It bothered me and pleased me that they always forgot my blindness. It made me feel a little less insecure, a little happier. I was so used to being handled at home. My parents and everyone in the palace had never treated me as more than an invalid._

"_Sorry," Katara said. "But he's walking so fast!"_

"_He _always_ walks fast," Sokka said. I could tell by the impatience in his voice that he was angry as well. As far as he was concerned, we were delaying his precious invasion plan. Or something._

"_He _does_ walk fast," Aang agreed. I couldn't tell where he was for a moment, so I imagine there was some airbending involved. He returned, his feet lightly grazing the ground before he was standing._

"_Toph, you need to go find Zuko," Katara ordered. "Why me?" I complained rather loudly. I was sure Katara would be making some kind of face at the blind girl. Real mature._

"_Because it's your fault he's run off!"_

"_I'm _blind_," I reminded her._

"_Don't be ridiculous; you know how to find him."_

_I folded my arms across my chest and made a pouty face. "Fine." I turned on my heel and stomped away, the ground fracturing and erupting beneath my feet. I knew I was creating footprints, evidence of an illegal earthbender in fire nation territory, but Aang could get rid of them. It _would_ be good training for him._

_I found Zuko within seconds of entering town. But I wasn't ready to bring him back to camp yet. He probably wouldn't have come anyway. He would be too angry to talk to me, and I wanted to wait. I often laughed at others' pain, but as I stood there, hiding from Zuko, I wondered if I was too hard on him specifically. He had gone through a lot, and just _maybe_ he didn't deserve my torturous behavior toward him. But that had never stopped me before._

The footsteps continued now, incredibly fast yet somehow still increasing in speed. I followed him, hiding behind carts and stands to stay out of sight.

Then it struck me that there must be a reason for him to walk so much faster than everyone else. It didn't take me long to realize that most people walk quickly because they have a place to go. Zuko walks quickly because he's angry.


	2. Walking Slow

**WARS AND WALKING**

Chapter Two: Walking Slow

_Most people walk slowly because they have no place to go. Toph… had a place to go._

Sounds of an earthbender on the move reached my ears. A few dirty shopkeepers looked out their windows, expecting to see an invasion, but all they saw was a little blind girl, walking slowly and heavily down the street, toward the outskirts of town. I didn't try to hide my following her home; she would know even if I did hide. I had to stop myself from calling out to her. Something in the back of my mind told me I should. Some brotherly instinct must have been awakened somewhere, but I pushed it back, true to my nature. I watched Toph leave town. I knew she was going back to camp. I wondered if I had gone a little too far. Toph was always so animated, so insulting, and it took a lot to insult _her_. I just followed silently, both of us going back to camp. I knew this was my fault. I thought back to earlier that afternoon…

"_Hey! Zuzu!" Toph's voice rang out across town._

_I didn't reply. They were stupid to send her after me. It was because of her that I left. It wasn't the first time she – or anyone, really – had insulted me, made me mad, but it was the first time I hadn't been able to handle it. I needed to get away, to make my legs move fast enough to keep up with my thoughts._

"_You know you'll come back. Aang needs you; it's your destiny!"_

_I still didn't reply. I knew she was pulling out the destiny card, but I needed time to myself. In my heart, I knew she was right of course, but I was proud as ever and refused to give in to speech._

"_Ya know," she continued, positively bellowing, "Honor is more than just knowing who you are and staying in your place! And anyway, nobody should tell you where your place is! Honor is also being able to respect others and yourself!"_

_I wheeled around, my anger at its absolute maximum. "THEN YOU HAVE NO HONOR!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. I hadn't realized how close behind me she was standing until I was through shouting._

_Her anger just dissipated. Her scowl softened; her shoulders slacked; the fire in her unseeing eyes went out. The taunts she had so easily tossed at me were gone; when she spoke again, her voice was empty. "I know." Toph hung her head and remained stationary. She was no longer rigid with anger and contempt for me. She didn't care that Katara had woken her up or that she was being forced to find me and apologize. She didn't care that we were both supposed to be training Aang and preparing for the invasion._

_I couldn't believe how cruel I had been to her. Sure, she was usually worse, but that was just her personality. Aang, Sokka, and Katara put up with her, at least most of the time. Katara and Toph argued once in a while, but I thought that was normal. Mai, Ty lee, and Azula fought, so it never struck me as odd that Toph and Katara would clash heads as well; I thought it was something all girls did._

_But cruelty was a part of my personality. However, when I looked back at Toph, I was surprised to find that the urge to apologize had returned. I don't know why, but something was making me want to cheer her up. She hadn't moved since I shouted at her, and I wasn't sure what to do. I was still mad, but now she was upset. I had never known how to deal with sad people._

"_Uhhh, Toph?"_

_Toph shook her head. I didn't know what to make of this, but I was relieved at least that she had moved. But then I became angrier that she was so unresponsive. She was obnoxious; didn't she deserve this? And I had only told the truth. If she really did believe that respect gave a person honor, she should have expected me to tell her that she had none. She was the most disrespectful person I had ever met, and she was criticizing me! She had no _right_ to do that! The longer I looked at her, the more my anger grew, threatening to burst out of me._

"_Zuko?"_

_I looked up. Toph was looking at me, worry in her eyes behind the sadness. I noticed a pain in my sweaty palms and looked down to see that my fists were clenched. I tried to relax them, but the fact that Toph's concern for me was not great enough to surpass her sadness only angered me more. I took a deep breath in and exhaled, trying to stay calm. I was being self-centered. She had hurt me, but I had hurt her. Why should her concern for me be greater than her emotions for herself? Mine weren't._

Toph continued toward camp, one foot dragging forward at a time. For an instant, I worried that, in her sadness, Toph would forget that we were in fire nation territory and earthbend. But my fears were empty and we reached the woods without incident.

I followed her, quickly closing the gap between us. I wondered if it was that I walk to quickly or that she walks too slowly, and it struck me that it was probably a combination of both. I wanted to catch up to her, so I was walking fast. Toph, however, was trudging along much too slowly for a person who had a place to go. Most people walk slowly because they have no place to go. Toph walks slowly because she's sad.


	3. Walking Together

**WARS AND WALKING**

Chapter Three: Walking Together

_Most people walk together because they're alike. We… weren't alike._

We fell into step with each other, the strengthening sound of synchronized footsteps signaling that neither of us was alone. The wind found its way through the trees to swirl around us, a hardship and a blessing. We plowed through the wind, side by side, and we were united as friends in our efforts against it. As we prepared to fight a force much stronger than wind, each of us knew that the other thought back to earlier that evening…

"_Toph. Please, wait."_

_A slow turn. "But you're right. I'm terrible at relationships. I'll admit that I like making people mad. I like causing pain, and I don't care about others. So I don't have honor." Sadness. Downcast eyes._

"_Uh, well, I'm sure you do, uh, have honor… somehow. Um, right?" Awkwardness._

_A small smile that fades quickly. "Well I suppose my definition of honor could have been off, but that doesn't mean much. I'm probably not going to treat people any better because that just isn't who I am." More sadness._

"_Well, um, my uncle – you, uh, know him I think – would say, um, 'Who you are is as fickle as, um, a broken tea kettle on the stove. The tea isn't going to be as hot or as, uh, good if the kettle is broken because the tea won't stay inside. And, um, that's like identity because we have to stay inside too – inside of our, uh, comfort zones'." Uncertainty._

_A chuckle. "Iroh probably wouldn't have said it like that. But I get it. A part of honor is being true to yourself. So I guess I've got some after all."_

_A nod. A smile. A frown. Furrowed eyebrows. "I think that's the part of honor I was searching for. My identity. I always thought that I'd find myself, my purpose, when my father accepted me, but now I know that my purpose is to fight my father with you and Aang and Katara and Sokka. I've finally found myself. I've finally found my place: here, with everyone. With a team. Because, despite what I used to think, no one can do everything alone. Sometimes, even leaders need guides." A brotherly look._

_Confusion. "So you're saying that we have to stick together?"_

"_Of course. We're at war. I can't move faster than someone else on my team or I'll be defeated. You can't move slower than someone else on your team or they'll be defeated. If we can move together as a team, no one will be defeated but our enemies."_

We continued forcing our way through the wind, each of us matching the other's stride and finding comfort in the knowledge that the other was there. War happened. People divided; friendships were lost. People walked too fast or too slow because of their differences, but others found the strength to walk as a team. Most people walk together because they're alike. We walk together because we're different.


End file.
